February 2012
6 posts
“I told her that I had loved her once and I made myself believe it. But I wonder...”
– Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin
two
Hours until my doctor’s appointment.
Number of appointments I have today (I got a filling this morning without novacaine. Now I’m not sure why they ever administer novacaine in the first place.)
Days until my dad and I have our monthly date night to celebrate eating exactly what we want be it healthy or the opposite.
Number of new zits on my face.
Weeks left on this current birth...
(my thoughts are all in caps right now)
Holy jesus. Holy shit. I think I just. Thoughts not coming together properly. I don’t want to reveal what’s happening just yet. Well, and I don’t know that I’m allowed to? No, I guess I could say, but I’m not going to. Not yet.
But here’s a hint: “Your last name in big ass letters looks pretty cool.”
Anonymous asked: Congrats on your promotion! Even if you don't love your job! Promotions are super duper! I work a job I don't care about either, but hey, free time? No stress? Just wanted to say hello, and I have not forgotten you, even though I've been a little absent lately. Something in the mail next week... xo TB
January 2012
24 posts
soil like silk
I resent my job, but at the same time I technically got paid today to write eleven fresh pages of my play in between taking phone calls. So at least there’s that. I had my composition notebook open to a blank page and was letting my wrist push the pen around to create scribbles, lines, but no writing, as my eyes drifted toward the ceiling and I thought “I got nothin’.” But...
“How many mouths nature has to fill, how many neighbors we have, how little we...”
– John Muir, My First Summer in the Sierra
pace
I’m feeling more like myself and I think it has a lot to do with being on my own. Having the house to myself, that is. I miss having my own place, but I’m starting to figure out my next step, so there’s progress. And by “starting to figure out” what I really mean is I’ve known all along, but I’m not running from it anymore. Or at least...
“The only real stumbling block is fear of failure. In cooking you’ve got to have...”
– Julia Child (via themoderncavegirl)
pitch
I’m still here, I’ve still got a voice. I’ll never give up throwing it out there whether anyone wants it or not. Sometimes I find that getting praise for something I’ve written can be a real hassle. What I mean is when people say “Yeah, give me more of that, just like that,” as if everything else I’d ever done was irrelevant to them. Well listen, I’m...
On MLK Day →
At the end of his all too short life, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. came to realize that the full meaning of the black freedom struggle was not just the achievement of a cup of coffee at an integrated restaurant, or riding in the front seat of a city bus. The “dream deferred,” in poet Langston Hughes’s words, was America’s failure to address poverty, from Harlem to Appalachia, from Indian...
“Then the music stopped. The reservation exhaled. Those blues created memories...”
– Reservation Blues by Sherman Alexie
“‘Don’t you understand that God didn’t kill any of us?’...”
– Reservation Blues by Sherman Alexie
Local Painter Celebrates Underground Music Scene →
That painter? He’s my boss. Yeah, we had fun taking turns reading this in the office today, unbeknownst to him as he’s been out all week doing, well, this.
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“Jackson” by Johnny Cash and June...
...
That moment when you get a text message at 10 PM on a Saturday from a mystery phone number which simply reads “hey” and it turns out it’s from an ex-boyfriend from four years ago.
I need to be up at 6 AM for work tomorrow morning, just…what the hell? I need my sleep, man.
Anonymous asked: Happy New Year, Caitlin! I hope 2012 is off to a good start! --TB
December 2011
19 posts
“Albuquerque” by Neil Young (from...
dough
I’m loving this whole being off on and around the holidays thing. It’s been too long since I’ve been able to enjoy something like this. Getting rsvp emails from different members of the family for the open house we’ll be having over here Monday. All yes’s as far as I’ve heard. I keep thinking of the tones of different people’s voices and it makes me feel...
mllehazelwood asked: Hi, Caitlin. Amber (aamber) said I should ask you for some good vegetarian recipes. My mother is having some people over for Christmas, and I really need to make the food that I can eat (my whole family is full of omnivores, which is fine, but they do not really care for me not eating meat). For Thanksgiving, my mother made a lot of stuff for me, but it was all out of a can (canned green beans,...
“Sometimes it’s hard to separate the concept of beauty from the concept of...”
– Then Again, by Diane Keaton
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Anonymous asked: Hey Caitlin. Something special is on its way! I want you to know that I made you a card and I was trying to dry it with a hair dryer (GLITTER!) but then it blew in the toilet, so I decided not to give you that card, and I gave up on my homemade efforts. Just know that I tried. Wishing you a very happy holiday season. HO HO HO! love TB :)
this day
You’re talking to [reading from] the newest “Freshman Farmie”, a member of EarthDance Organic Farm’s apprenticeship class of 2012. Just got the email today. I feel bouncy.
I love food. I love it. I can’t wait to spend even more time with it. Foods straight from the soil have the most satisfying bites. Just wipe the dirt off the carrot and crunch into it. I...
3 tags
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faces
Diane Keaton’s memoirs have me lusting after Al Pacino all over again. There’s nothing quite as delectable as the sight of his face circa the Godfather Parts I and II. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a face I want to outright lick as bad as his. It was made to be devoured. God, the sugar! I think I might enjoy it even more than Robert Redford’s Butch Cassidy mustache,...
“Oh! Darling” by The Beatles
...
splitting
Two weeks notice: submitted. Peacing out of there just in time to avoid working the holidays. “Have fun doing the same thing in a different context,” one of my coworkers said. Yeah, thanks, I will. Or maybe I won’t, that remains to be found out. I’ll be leaving behind a massive security net—rehire at the same rate I left off at. Thanks for making my decision a million...
current state of mind
I got a new job. I’m not sure if I’m happy about it or not. Because this new job means a 20 mile commute (also in rush hour, compared to the now luxuriant 6 with almost no traffic) and getting 65 cents less/hour. To essentially be doing the same thing I already do, just for a better company (keep in mind it doesn’t pertain to what I see myself doing in the future unless you count...
a dusting
I could try to pretend like I have something important to say right now, but I’d be lying to you and to myself. So I’ll write just for the sake of it, just for me. I’m feeling uninspired, but sometimes I just need to force myself. Whatever will come will come.
I woke up to the first frost of the year and instead of being turned off I felt cozy. I find snow to be charming between...
“Class rules on public discussion:
Anybody gets to ask any question about any...”
– From David Foster Wallace’s English 102-Literary Analysis: Prose Fiction syllabus (via brighteryellow)
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